top of page

Bodybuilder suffers sinus infection after snorting giant mound of whey protein

Writer's picture: Bob KinnerBob Kinner

Say hello to my little friend!

After a trip to the emergency room and a shot of penicillin, self-proclaimed bodybuilder Dave Furlong re-evaluated what he thought was a flawless plan for getting more protein into his body as quickly as possible.


Dave told us. "I was trying to maximize the biological value of my protein intake. Whey protein isolate has a biological value of 150BV%... but that's when it's taken orally... I know what you're thinking and I already tried that. Way too messy! I'm done turning vanilla into chocolate!


The other night I was watching the movie, Scarface, and it hit me. I swear, Al Pacino's acting speaks to me. Raise bars, do rails, say hello to my little friend! So I dump my scoops onto the countertop, split it up with my gym membership card, rolled up a $20 bill, and instantly regretted my decision."


Dave quickly learned why it's called protein and not "blow-tein", as the instantized powder coagulated, caking up his sinus. Like many bodybuilding professionals, Dave did not immediately call 9-1-1. He knew better than that. Instead, he got out his phone and began videoing his results on Facebook live. A wave of people chimed in commenting:


"Call 911!"


"Seek medical attention, you dumbass!"


"Get one of those weird-ass teapot-looking things those where you pour water in your nose like that video with the asian lady in it."


But Dave didn't get 13" biceps by listening to the wisdom of others. He continued to run protein rails like a train. With red, watery eyes and a swollen face, he figured it was only a matter of time before the rest of him was swole, too. And it did! His sinus got infected with enough protein for the bacterial to live on for the next million generations. After a few days, the infection spread to his eyes and ears. He eventually checked into the doctor's who gave him a quick shot of penicillin.




2 views0 comments

Recent Posts

See All

Comments


Barbell with Weights

Thanks for submitting!

    © 2019 by The Push Press. Proudly created with Wix.com

    bottom of page